Lately I have avoided the quiet moments. The moments when your thoughts settle, sort themselves out, and start to flood your mind and soul. Usually I love being quiet--it's when inspiration hits me and gets me giddy. It's when I can hear God nudge and whisper. It's when I'm able to see the beauty in the simple things--the way my love's eyes crinkle when he smiles, the way sunflowers turn towards the sun, or the green beauty of fields blowing rhythmically in the wind.
I think I've avoided being quiet lately because I'm fearful. I can tell there are a bundle of things brewing up inside my chest and I'm nervous to unleash it all. Instead of embracing and seeking out time to reflect, I am busy doing anything and everything. Some times I don't even shut off my mind--I continue to let the anxious thoughts of absolutely nothing run circles in my mind.
Perfectionism.
Fear of falling short.
Fear of the unknown.
Today I was able to sit down and breathe. I think we all have seasons when we would rather ignore life. We get tired or too comfortable, so we put our days on repeat and busy our bodies and minds until they are numb. Thank goodness God understands this imperfect journey of life we're on. He gets us before we even "get" ourselves. He plants seeds in us that he just waits for us to unleash and comprehend.
God knows the anxious thoughts of our hearts. He plants and harvests in us the crazy dreams that breed uncertainty and fear. He has awesome purpose for us through seasons of quiet and seasons of uncertainty. He is all knowing--He sees all of us. He knows every shortcoming, every fear, every weird thought, every insecurity ... yet He still loves us.
He still loves us.
Through loud seasons. Quiet seasons. Stormy and broken seasons. Seasons of ignorance and seasons of complete awareness.
All of this to say that we all have purpose. There's no reason to search for unattainable perfection. Once we accept that God sees all of us and still loves us, it's a little bit easier to search for and live out our purpose.
There's no reason to fear the quiet moments, because we don't need to fear imperfection.
Here's to living real and living out loud the passions and purpose the God has imprinted on our minds and hearts. Let's unleash ourselves from the fear of the quiet and the grasp of perfection and just be.
Just be.
{{This post was entirely fueled by too much coffee and was highly therapeutic. I now realize my words could make absolutey no sense to you, but in embracing imperfection I'm choosing to overlook at fact. Enjoy!}}
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